Uday is the Youth Engagement/Admin Coordinator and Co-creator of the Project Earth initiative at Jhamtse Gatsal.

Q: What attracted you to Jhamtse Gatsal as a place to work?

A: I hail from a small town. When I finished my schooling, like every small-town dreamer, I gravitated towards the glamourous city lights and life. While pursuing my education, I also explored my career as a professional musician and tasted almost everything the metro city had to offer.

After a fair share of exploration, I joined Teach for India - an NGO aiming to provide quality education to slum/underprivileged schools. By the end of the fellowship, I was determined to go towards a more challenging and remote location where the need was more prominent.

The first thing that caught my attention was the location: Arunachal Pradesh is one of India's remotest and most ignored states. Second, I wanted to be close to nature and be in a completely new setting, culture, and context. I was looking for an off-grid life where I could live and work for a cause that serves humanity - be it any form of service. After years of living in the city, I longed for a place like Jhamtse Gatsal.

Q: Has living and working at Jhamtse Gatsal changed you in any way?

A: Back in the city, I was living a very individualistic life, which is what we are taught right from the beginning - to be independent, work for money, and progress at the cost of anything. All of these ideas were instilled throughout my life, but I felt a sense of discomfort in living such a life. Professionally I was skilled, and I could get things done with ease, but values like compassion and my method of working were very goal oriented and not human-oriented.

This is one of the reasons I chose to shed such qualities at Jhamtse Gatsal. Over the years, my understanding of life has only started to reform through Gen la’s* guidance - where he talks about the 8 verses of mind training. My biggest insight arose from my awareness of interdependence. All these years, I kept believing that I was an independent entity and had achieved everything on my own.

In one of our retreats - Gen la* asked a question - Is there anything in life that is not interdependent? That was when I began understanding the lie I have been living. I held on to this lie of independence as it fed my ego. I took immense pride in being independent. But a whole new sense of liberation came when I started accepting that I am flawed and interdependent.

In each of Gen la’s* retreats, when we sit down as a community and learn about life and share reflections about the year and how to grow each year, is very empowering to me. Each year I realize something that I need to shed/unlearn, and each year I find something radical to learn. I have broken down, cried, and have been vulnerable in front of the entire community and I never felt judged or mocked. Toxic masculinity is very prevalent in India, and it was liberating to shed such negative qualities with Gen la’s* guidance and the Community’s support.

Living in the Community has made me a better son, a better partner, better community member. I always tell others I am actually getting paid to become a better human being. While my journey has just begun in terms of transformation, I feel safe, accepted, and encouraged to continue on this path to becoming a better human being.

Q: Has there been one moment, one event, one interaction where you had a “wow” moment and said, “This is it, this what Jhamtse Gatsal is, and this is why I am here?”

A: It is not just one. There are many - the view that I have when I brush my teeth in the morning, the fact that I get to live on a mountain so close to nature, I do not have to worry about my next meal, I enjoy walking all over the community for work/to meet people, to seeing the most gorgeous sunset and sleeping in my small yet comfortable room that is my home.

In all of these events, I feel an immense sense of gratitude towards what this community is. It is in every essence - heaven - where all I need to do is to work hard, be a better human being, enjoy nature and the Community, and spend every minute making Jhamtse Gatsal and the lives of community members better. However, my biggest hook for this place - I always heard about - Your vibe attracts your tribe and how everybody talks about energies and intentions getting manifested over time. I think I have experienced it at Jhamtse Gatsal.

Celebrations at Jhamtse Gatsal during Joyineering, Dell, Shift Lab and Goal Zero’s visit – 2018 – (Left to Right – Shalom, Uday, Tenzin, Ophelia)

Be it a project, personal or professional goal, Jhamtse Gatsal has somehow never failed to provide the right environment for me to grow. Many projects that I was a part of were about to fail but somehow everything works out. I have met some of the most amazing and inspiring people at Jhamtse Gatsal. I have faced immense challenges but was always able to pull through with the community’s support. It is very difficult to express how the cosmos aligned in our support to move forward, but after coming to Jhamtse Gatsal I have truly experienced that grand design and the ulterior scheme of the universe which usually we hear in stories.

I feel content that I am not just a cog in this capitalist machine. I feel truly happy that my work and existence can and does make a difference. Somewhere I lost my faith in humanity, but Jhamtse Gatsal has helped me to find it again. I feel grateful that I got a chance to be at Jhamtse Gatsal - where I could truly work on myself and grow. A lot of people in this world are stuck in the 9 to 5 routine with no purpose. I thank all the people who got me here and to Jhamtse International and people of Jhamtse Gatsal who helped me reach here and push even further and our donors and sponsors who enable me to do this good work daily. I feel humbled for I am deeply flawed, but I surely am on my way to working on each of my flaws, taking it one day, one flaw at a time.

*Gen la is a title of respect for the Founder and Director of Jhamtse Gatsal, Lobsang Phuntsok. It is pronounced with a hard g, like get.

A Heart-to-Heart with Uday Nair